New, Blue, Blood
I was nine years old when the Colts drafted Andrew Luck. At the time it had zero effect on my life. I was in the middle of making the switch from being compulsively obsessed with Star Wars or whatever to being compulsively obsessed with sports. I was getting into basketball and was a couple months away from getting into football as well.
For the first nine years of my life football was “the thing that dad watches that requires me to find something to do besides watch tv.” It was a nuisance. I didn’t understand it and when I tried to watch it I couldn’t help but think it was boring. Now that I’m a grown man I recognize that this being my perspective led to me missing out on the best era of Colts football since they’ve been in Indianapolis. I was probably too young to really understand it anyway, even if I had been a fan, but it still sucks to realize something like that after the fact.
A couple months after Luck was drafted I actually started watching. I honestly don’t remember what flipped the switch, but I was hooked.
Here’s the thing with Andrew Luck’s rookie year being the first season of football I consumed- that’s not normal! Over the past decade Andrew Luck’s rookie numbers have sunk behind guys like Baker Mayfield (lmao) and Justin Herbert so it’s kinda hard for people now to understand what he looked like, but he didn’t feel like a rookie. He looked like a real guy out there. Sure he would do some silly bullshit, as rookies are want to do, but most of the time he would return to his bag and claw the colts into the game late.
The next couple years were fun. The colts roster building philosophy was basically “let’s see how much Andrew can do with table scraps for an offensive line” and they were still consistently good.
I took in Andrew Luck’s entire career as it was happening. As far as I’m concerned we were both rookies in 2012- him playing football, me watching slack jawed as Superman does it again. When he retired in 2019 it ripped my heart out.
DISCLAIMER
I don’t blame Andrew Luck for retiring. I would’ve done the same thing in his position frankly. Andrew Luck retiring wasn’t malicious, but it was sad. I’m not a crier. I hate it. It makes me feel yucky. And I especially don’t cry about entertainment. I cried about that though. It’s still the only time I’ve cried about sports, and as silly as it may have been it was bigger than “oh god we’re gonna suck this year.” The dream was dead. The most consistent dream in my life from 4th grade to 11th grade was the possibility that Andrew Luck would be up there hoisting the Lombardi. Not just the Colts as a team. I wanted it for that guy more than I wanted it for anybody.
The Colts have spent the last fourish years doing various “quick fixes” that, outside of Philip Rivers, have been largely infuriating.
IT’S TIME TO BE MEAN
I CALLED IT. I knew immediately that trading for Carson Wentz was a bad move for the Colts. Over the summer I eventually gaslit myself into believing it might not be a disaster, and then it was a disaster and I haven’t ignored my gut since.
Matt Ryan is a very nice man and a pillar of the Atlanta community. His colts tenure was [REDACTED].
This year was actually quite enjoyable for me. I decided that beating Kansas City was going to be the highlight of the season Week three, and I was right. Jeff Saturday was our head coach, and outside of the month where I was scared Jim Irsay would hire him for the future I recognize in retrospect that it’s still fun to get silly with it from time to time.
Week 18 they executed a perfect “oh darn it I guess we lost and have to pick in the top 5 now” maneuver.
And then it was draft time.
For most of this year I wanted the colts to take a defensive lineman and wait for next year to grab our franchise quarterback.
Bryce Young was the unanimous QB1 most of the year, but I have a general rule that it I don’t have to tilt my neck upward to meet your eyes you can’t be starting for my football team. CJ Stroud balled out in Ohio State’s playoff game, throwing frequently to future Colt Marvin Harrison Jr. and that’s when I started thinking “quarterback in the first might not be such a bad idea.” No thanks on Will Levis. Not that I did any actual evaluation, but in the event he’s good I really didn’t want St. Elmo’s to shame the state and start rolling out mayonnaise and banana peel based dishes in his honor.
What about Anthony Richardson? I mean I didn’t watch him, but what’s his deal? It seems like he wasn’t exactly good, but he’s also doing all of this crazy stuff that nobody knew what to do with. The more I learned about Anthony Richardson, the more I knew he was going to be a Colt.
One thing about having the same management structure for 5+ years is you start to notice patterns with the “type of guy” your team goes after in free agency and the draft. Chris Ballard is obsessed with unique athletes. Quenton Nelson, Dayo Odeyingbo, Johnathan Taylor- the list goes on. There’s something called an “RAS score” that comes out about every prospect before the draft. It’s on a scale from 1–10 and is based entirely on the player’s athletic profile- nothing on the field. Over the past few years it’s been pretty easy to figure out a player’s RAS score based on whether or not Chris Ballard took them. If he did they probably have an RAS of 9.8 or higher. I’ll call this “the freak zone.”
Anthony Richardson was a 10. Like out of 10. Like the highest RAS score ever for a quarterback. If that wasn’t enough to think at least Chris Ballard was on board, then I saw him speak and he was not only humble but well aware of specific improvements he needs to make to his game. He has the longest list of “Things I can do that nobody else can” which makes me excited, and means something to the Colts General Manager. I was sold at the combine, but I had to wait a few more weeks for him to actually be a Colt.
I was nauseous in the hours leading up to the draft. The thought of somebody trading up to three to snatch our darling boy was too much to bear. Then the Texans traded up after already having taken CJ Stroud and I knew Anthony Richardson was going to be a Colt.
I have no idea what’s going to happen now. After listening to the Ballard/Steichen press conference it sounds like they’re going to throw this super raw quarterback out there and hope he develops on the field, otherwise known as “The Josh Allen Method.” I trust Ballard, at least with drafting. He drafts good players, and his philosophy is consistent. Shane Steichen turned Jalen Hurts into somebody who could perfectly run that Philadelphia offense- if anybody can get it out of Anthony Richardson it’s those guys.
It’s a new day for the Colts. We didn’t look at the 36 year old free agent quarterbacks this year and say “we can make this work for a season.” Chris Ballard took a damn swing, and I can only hope Anthony Richardson is our guy in perpetuity.